king of the world

christianity is hard.

trust me, if you're truly a christian you kno wat i mean. i never thot letting God back into my life wud be easy.

i'm having some major issues giving wat i'm going thru up to God. i have some serious letting go issues i need work thru. i wish i cud just let this situation go and move on, but it seems like i cant.

i feel this huge urge to scream, throw up, and run far far away. but i can't do that. God is testing me. i can feel it. i just wish i cud a little more a help if ya kno wat i mean.

its really confusing, and frustrating, and i'm not sure wat to do. i guess i'm just gonna have to pray some more. i've prayed more in the last weekend than i have in the last year altogether.

ack.

i hope everything works out for once and for all tomorrow...
if i have the guts to get the ball rolling.